Thursday, October 8, 2009

Josh the Energizer Bunny

Our children are all what I would politely call high energy. We have yet to have a baby that is content just to laze in the stroller and happily watch the world go by. No, all of ours have to be right there in the thick of things, doing their part to keep the universe off-kilter. I find this interesting because while I am admittedly high strung, Aaron is so laid back that not even a rapidly approaching Mack truck could cause him to quicken his step when crossing the street. It's all good with him, ya know?

And yet, when it comes to the approximately 456 gazillion different combination of DNA that our genes can produce, the spaz trait is apparently highly dominant over the chill trait. Which means that we have a 0% chance of producing a child that is mellow, which is apparently exactly the same chance that we have of producing a child that is female.

The latest child to give me a run for my money is sweet Baby Josh. Still sweet, but no longer baby really, he is evidently trying to make the case to change his name legally to Hell on Wheels. The kid is EVERYWHERE. If there is a physical challenge that presents itself, Josh is happy to tackle it and will often go searching for it. Recent antics have included:
  • Scaling the baby gates before he even knew how to get up the stairs on the other side of the gate once he got over it. A climber - yay!
  • Trying to squeeze his whole body UNDER the baby gate after we raised it a few inches in an attempt to keep him from trying to go OVER it. He was foiled by Drew (who told on him) and his chubby little tummy, which trapped him halfway through, ala Peter Rabbit under Mr. MacGregor's gate.
  • Climbing onto the rocking chair in the nursery and rocking the crap out of the rocker (standing, facing backwards) just to the point where it almost tipped over. And laughing the whole time about the thrill of it.
  • Attempting to walk down the stairs. Even though he still prefers to crawl on level ground.
  • Walking up slides at the playground. Even though he still prefers to crawl on level ground.
And the list goes on and on. His complete and total lack of fear or ability to moderate risky behavior combined with my hearing loss means that I literally have to keep my eyes on the kid all day long. Because when he's sky diving off the arms of the sofa, I'm not gonna hear it coming from the kitchen.

Even more awesome is the fact that he is quite possibly the world's WORST daytime sleeper (although I suppose I can feel grateful that he is an awesome nighttime sleeper). Whereas most babies his age sleep anywhere from 3 to 5 hours a day, Josh only sleeps in 45 minute stretches, once, sometimes twice, a day. This leaves a lot of hours where he is roaming around in public (i.e outside the safe confines of his crib) and needs to be supervised. By me.

Not only does he not sleep, he doesn't seem to need the sleep and rarely melts down over lack of sleep. This week, he has has gone almost every day without napping until 4 pm, at which point he snoozes for about 45 minutes. He then comments for another 45 until I feel bad that he's yapping to himself trapped in a crib and I release him from the cage crib.

Secretly, I am jealous because I've always felt that sleeping, along with eating, is a GIANT waste of time. When I think of the increased productivity I could achieve if I gave up all forms of refueling, I get positively giddy with excitement. So I'm thinking the kid may have a real gift. Now we just gotta figure out how to channel it....


Shell said...

I cracked up at your spaz gene comment, as well as your chances of having a girl...since we have that spaz thing going on here, too, as well as all boys!

Cara Fox said...

Shell - looks like your spacing is about the same as mine, too? A little closer b/w the last're brave. It took me 3 years to recover from Baby Bunching enough to reproduce again - LOL.

Emily said...

I feel your pain. Charlie is the human wrecking ball. But really...eating a giant waste of time!? That's my favorite time of the day!