Tuesday, April 8, 2008

My Three Sons

I know, I know, so I said we weren’t going to find out the sex of the baby in advance this time. But my husband (and practically everyone else I knew) made me absolutely bonkers by asking on a daily basis and I finally caved. After which, my husband felt bad and told me we really didn’t have to find out if I really didn’t want to, but the mental shift had already been made for me so it was too late.

As evidenced by the title of this post, it’s ANOTHER BOY!!!

Most people assume that I am desperate for a girl, since I have two boys already. Interestingly, this is not the case. Having grown up with two sisters (one of whom is ten years my junior), I feel kind of like I’ve already “done the girl thing”. I’ve attended scores of dance recitals, shopped for countless Christmas/Easter/Birthday/Prom/Formal dresses, and survived exposure to more rounds of PMS than I care to think about. But I’ve never been to a soccer game, saved money on haircuts by just going with a buzz in the summers, or been on the “let’s just be friends” end of a breakup before. I’m pretty excited about all of this. As a bonus, I never ever have to plan a wedding again – I simply perform the mother-of-the-groom duties by writing a check for the rehearsal dinner (which my future daughter in law will plan herself because she will be afraid I will mess it up), wearing beige, and shutting up. And probably, no one will even notice if I wear the same beige dress to all three weddings, so I can spend the cash saved on a really expensive handbag instead.

Aaron pointed out other benefits. We now have enough men in the family for a golf foursome and a two-on-two pickup game. Which means I will never have to play sports to even out the team and when they are older I can spend my weekends perusing the mall (in peace and quiet) while the boys play and watch whatever sports they want to with their father.

So far, these are the only cons I’ve thought of:

  • I will have to listen to a lot of talk about sports. All the time. Forever.
  • Some areas of my home will always be stinky. My own bedroom smells okay since the female/male ratio is balanced, but my boys are only 2 and 4 and their shared bedroom already smells like a mixture of sweaty socks, throw up, and rotting dead animals, even after a thorough cleaning.
  • I will probably make a lot of trips to the emergency room and I should really get used to seeing blood and protruding broken bones now.
  • I will need to take out a second mortgage to buy groceries when they are teenagers. We are already going through 2 loaves of bread, 2 gallons of milk, and a million boxes of cereal a week…
  • I will need to take out a third mortgage (do these exist?) to pay my car insurance in about 12 years.

So yeah, I’m pretty excited. Except there is one last con – we have had so many boys, we are out of boy names. Currently accepting nominations…


Bubbe said...

I LOVE the description of the future mother-of-the groom since it perfectly fits MY role in Cara's & Aaron's wedding, down to the beige dress! AND furthermore, let it be known, I was NOT one of the relentless harassers to find out the gender of Fox Kid #3!!!!

Stimey said...

You're Linda's friend and co-author! I'm pleased to "meet" you! Absolutely no offense was taken over at the Junk Pyramid; all was in jest!

Congratulations on your third boy. I love having three little dudes. And honestly, if the third had been a girl, I have no idea what I would have done with her. :)